Pain and Mercy
by Avoline Malfoy
Summary: You couldn't live like this, the hunger overwhelming and the possibility of hurting an innocent too high. Prompt: Imagine Castiel mercy killing you after becoming a vampire. O/C does not have a name or set gender. Very sad.


_Disclaimer: I own nothing_

* * *

 _So, I saw a prompt on tumblr and had to run with it! I've never written Castiel except as an extra character, so this is uncharted territory for me. But, I'm gonna give it a go, cause I'm just that crazy,_

 _Now, sit back and relax, and grab the tissues._

 _Love always,_

 _Avoline_

* * *

You were hiding in the shadows of the bunker, the light too bright for your newly heightened eye sight to handle. It was dead silent, with you were grateful for as you prayed to the only angel you knew who would do whatever you asked of him. A spear of pain pierced your heart, but you knew it had to be done. You couldn't live like this, the hunger overwhelming and the possibility of hurting an innocent too high.

A flutter of wings, and Castiel stood before you. He tilted his head, slightly confused, as tears welled in your eyes.

"Cas," you whispered, hating yourself for having to do this to him. You loved him, more than you thought possible, and you knew he loved you. But neither of you had ever vocalized it, and now it was too late.

"(Y/N), what happened," he said, probably at normal volume, but it felt so loud in your ears. You cringed in pain, and he crouched before you. "What's wrong? Please, tell me." You met his gaze, working up the strength to tell him something you knew would hurt him.

"I was being stupid," you explained. "I tried to take on a nest of vampires alone. They overpowered me, held me down, turned me." Your voice cracked on the last two words, and he drew you into his arms. "I can't live like this, Castiel. The hunger, it's too much. I don't wanna hurt anyone." He rubbed your arm as you cried into his shirt.

"I'll call Sam and Dean," he began. "They'll get what we need. We can fix this." You shook your head.

"They'll just find me and turn me again," you sobbed. "Cas, please, just kill me."

He stiffed before you, and you felt the self-loathing wash over you again. But you knew it was the only way. And Cas would do it, not because he honestly thought of you as a monster, but out of mercy. And mostly because you had asked him, and he never denied you.

"I'm sorry, Cas," you murmured. "But I can't live like this, and I can't live looking over my shoulder, waiting on them to find me. Please, Cas, I'm begging you." He resumed rubbing your arm, but you could feel his body sag in defeat.

"You make a fair point," he mumbled. "And I won't deny you peace." His free hand gently tilted your head back so that you were eye to eye. "But before I do, know that I too was 'being stupid,' as you put it. I love you, I have for a while, and I was too cautious to say anything." He sighed, his gaze shifting to the side. "Now it's too late. Because killing you is the only way to give you any peace." You managed a smile through the tears.

"I love you too, Castiel," you soothed. "I should have said so earlier." You reached up and pressed your lips to his before standing. "Make it quick, please." He stood, and you saw the glint of the angel blade.

This was it. You had trained under two of the best hunters, and you were just as good. But Fate had other plans, and you were at peace with that. You could see the tears in Castiel's eyes, and almost changed your mind. But you knew you would never have peace as long as you lived, and quickly shoved the second thoughts away.

"I love you," he repeated quietly, his voice choked. "Close your eyes, please. I don't think I can handle watching the light fade from them." You nodded, closing your eyes, and could barely hear him lift his arm.

"I love you too, Castiel," you echoed just as the blade sliced through your neck.

* * *

He shook as your head hit the floor. He should have spoke up sooner, should have been by your side every minute of every hour. Then you wouldn't be dead at his feet, and he wouldn't feel this overwhelming sorrow. The angel blade clattered to the floor, and he dropped to his knees.

"I'm sorry, (Y/N)," he whispered. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. It was never supposed to be this way. This was never supposed to happen." Tears streamed down his face as he repeated the apology over and over, too crippled with grief to anything else. He reached for your head, gently running a hand over your hair and memorizing every detail of your face. He would never forget you, or anything about you.

He was still on his knees when the boys showed up hours later.


End file.
